My apologies for even reading The Sun, but surely this article is worthy of discussion:
ENGLISH? I ONLY NEED 100 WORDS
LOST IN TRANSLATION ... 'When I said Crouch, I didn't mean get on your knees'
FABIO CAPELLO has finally admitted he is a man of few words - 100 to be precise.
Capello reacted curtly to continued criticism that his command of the English language is not good enough.
He was adamant it was not necessary to have a wide vocabulary to get his message across to his team.
The Italian said: "If I need to speak about the economy or other things, I can't speak.
"But when you speak about tactics, you don't use a lot of words. I don't have to speak about a lot of different things. Maximum 100 words."
As England's £6million-a-year boss, that works out at £60,000 a word.
Capello claims he is trying to brush up on his English, even though it seems to get worse with every squad get-together.
And he found it quite a struggle to argue his point.
He added: "I try to improve every day. I listen television, I listen to radio, watch the television. I study as well."
So what programmes does he watch? Coronation Street? EastEnders? He declared: "I put the subtitles. Is OK? Enough? Different programmes.
"Football, yes, always football. But other sports, some films, some different things."
Does he find it difficult to understand Match of the Day pundit Alan Hansen?
Capello revealed: "I understand when you come from the north, one from London, I study very well. Others are so-so."
An exasperated FA Press officer had to intervene, complaining: "It's getting silly."
He did not specify whether he was talking about the questions or Capello's attempts to answer them.
Whatever the manager's argument that you need only 100 words to get your message across, his poor linguistic skills do cause him problems.
His failure to tell Rio Ferdinand he was being axed as captain has led to legitimate questions being asked about his man-management.
He avoids as much as possible speaking to his players on the phone, because he finds it hard to converse that way.
Bizarrely, though, he did call Steven Gerrard to explain the captaincy situation.
But that is a rare example of him actually contacting a player directly.
When he desperately wanted Paul Scholes for the World Cup, he did not make contact himself but left it to his assistant Franco Baldini.
Had Scholes been called by Capello personally, the player has claimed he may have gone to South Africa.
Andy Carroll will get his chance to start against Ghana in tonight's friendly at Wembley, having missed out on Saturday's Euro 2012 qualifying win over Wales.
According to the manager, the Liverpool star is not fully fit and he does not intend to play him for the whole game.
But he does want another look at the big striker, after his impressive debut against France last November.
Capello said: "This is a friendly game and, in a friendly game, he can play up to half-time, or more, or 60 minutes.
"For this reason, this game is important for him and for me. He's not fit like November. He needs more games. He's big, so he needs more games.
"I think more than three or four games, minimum, to return to being the same player he was in November.
"Carroll is a player who's really good in the air but not only this. The movement when he receives the ball is good. He's strong. He's a good player, a good forward."
Capello feels tonight will be a good test of his whole squad and can show England do have more strength in depth than it seemed after the World Cup.
He stated: "Some players have improved a lot.
"When they started they were young but now is a good moment for Ashley Young, James Milner and Adam Johnson, even though he's not here this time.
"And now we have some new players like Jack Wilshere, Andy Carroll. Really good players."
Some fans who have shelled out up to £40 are unhappy England will be fielding a 'B' team tonight and there is a view it shows how pointless friendlies are in March.
But Capello thinks having most of the squad stay together over 10 days is good for team bonding and the fringe players will benefit from the run-out.
He insisted: "It will be interesting for the fans but more so for me to see the value of the players when they play here.
"It will be a tough game. Ghana are a really good team.
"These are the fixtures. FIFA fixtures. It's not my decision.
"When we play in the week, we stay together for two days. That is all.
"This is a good period to stay together, create a group and create a spirit."
As Fabio would say, that is really, really important.
Here's a ton of fun, Fab
FABIO CAPELLO says he only needs 100 words to communicate with his players.
SunSport’s Paul Jiggins — who knows only a few more — looks at what those words might be:
Very, Nice, Football, Terry, Leader, Captain, Armband, Rio, Who?, Mobile, Telephone, Do, Don’t, Shoot, Work, Placement, No, Butter, Ketchup, Engleez, Not, Good, Run, Pass, Lose, Score, Save, Cash, Contract, Extension, Compensation, Rooney, Tackle, Pay-Off, Prostitute, Affairs, Kick, Into, Touch, Out, Gerrard, Left, Ashley, Stop, Pass, Move, Back, To, Italy, Soon, Defensive, Space, Gonna, Win, Vauxhall, Frank, Wembley, Crouch, Tall, Big, Task, Home, Away, Tuck, Inside, Men, Behind, Ball, Germany, Nightmare, Possession, Money, Old, Rope, For, Four, Three, Two, Six, Boys, Can, Go, Off, Rest, Jack, Saviour, Farewell, Gareth, Tell, Them, Stuart, Ask, Franco, Result, Nineteen, Sixty-Six, I’m, Outta, Here, Suckers.
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